Day 415 - 'one' tell all fire

I am so grateful for my Ray.

Yep...I had one of those the other day. That is, a fire that is more than just the BIG flames that I saw.  Not that big of flames, I'm just adding some drama.  Although my hubby may argue that one. 

I started my day as normal, you know, my morning routine of hot water and lemon, writing in my journal, doing my tai chi etc, etc, etc.  A small part of this routine is lighting candles on my desk.  I used to have one candle but then I added a couple more because each candle represented 10 years of loving life ahead of me, so 3 candles meant 30 years, if you didn't already figure that one out I thought I would help you. LOL

In the middle of my routine that morning the phone rang so I got up to answer it and then Ray arose from bed etc, etc, etc.  Well...guess what I forgot to do.  Part of this story is that the candles were in a beautiful wooden candle holder that Ray had made.  So...when flames hit wood what happens?  Yep, you got it, we have fire!

I came around the corner and saw flames, big fat flames.  I ran up to it and yelled 'fire!'.  This is one of Ray's favorite words.  By the time you could hear the thud, thud, thud of Ray's footsteps, I had blown out the fire and white wax was splattered all over the table, my books and papers.  What a mess!

I miss my homemade yogurt.
I can't have any cold so yogurt is off
the list.  wahhhhh

The point of this story is not the fire, it's not the candle holder, it's what I learned afterwards.  The other day when Ray and I were playing our daily game of cards he mentioned that he was glad that I didn't replace the previous homemade candelabra with a new holder and candles.  You see, when Ray was young his family had a few fires and one did major damage to their home.  I asked him why he didn't mention it before and he said he knew how much the candles meant to me and didn't want to ruin it for me.  Yep that's my guy!

So we decided that I will find something else to use that doesn't use an actual candle or flame.  I really should not be doing an open flame anyways because of the prescriptions I'm on give me a tendency to forget things never mind my age memory problems as well.  Those candles don't mean that much to me that I want him to worry every time I light them.  After being together for so long you learn that a successful relationship is about compromise.  It's not about getting things your way or proving that you are right, it's about each person's feelings being considered and a common ground being found for the issue.

ahhhhh my little box of goodies.

It doesn't work all the time but with the way our life is right now it's more important than ever that we spend time working things out right away and not letting them fester.  You see we can't waste time...not a moment.  We don't know how long we have together, nobody does, but we face that reality every day and we are grateful for that.  We are grateful that we know each day how important it is not to let the little things bother you, they still do, we do argue but we don't let it go on and on and on and on. 

So one little fire can mean so much more than just the flame especially if you don't burn the house down!  On the search we will go to find a solution that works for both of us.  But it means so much more than he didn't want to tell me it bothered him and that he finally told me it did.  Weird eh?

My tummy is still bothering me quite a bit, I may have to up my pain meds to make sure that I can continue to have fun and not let it hinder what I want to do for the day. Yesterday we went to an organic market in Burnaby and then we spent the time driving home stopping at a few garage sales, trying to get into another market and then we went out for lunch.  It felt so good just to take things as we found them and not do the hurry, hurry back home.  Yep we just enjoyed the time riding in the old comet and enjoying each other's company.  I'll say it again...you CAN gain time but you need to grab ahold of it and STOP and that's where you will find it.  Right under your feet, just slow down and enjoy it! Finding time is not about fitting more into your life, it's about stopping and enjoying time.  Here's wishing you find some time today.

signed 'one' flame less purple ladybug